Why are kids mean to each other? Usually they’re trying to get back at someone who hurt them. Or they’re trying to embarrass someone they don’t like even if that person hasn’t done anything.
Maybe bullies think that targeting others can save you from being targeted. Or that being first in line to start a rumor, make a rude comment, or threaten someone makes you cooler.
Anyone who believes that is wrong.
Cruel’s Not Cool! an anti-bullying campaign to engage students, teachers, administrators and parents in a community-wide exploration of our culture of cruelty, why cruel’s not cool, and what each of us can do, moment-by-moment to take back our schools by making them safer, more accepting places for all students all the time.
From Terra’s Inbox: Q&A About Bullying
From a Teen: “My brother and stepbrother aren't nice to me.”Hey Terra, I am in a blended family with 7 kids. The two oldest ones are very good friends. The next two oldest are very good friends. The last two are my brother and step brother, both are 13, and they are extremely best friends. That leaves me no one. All of the older ones live by themselves or with roommates. So I live with the two 13-year-olds. My stepbrother is the leader and my brother is the follower. If my stepbrother is mad at me, then my brother will be mad at me too. Also, if my brother isn't home and it's just me and my stepbrother that will be practically the only time he will have a more than five word conversation with me or play with me. I'm very nice and usually liked by everyone. I want to understand why my stepbrother isn't very warm to me and what should I do when they both gang up on me in a verbal fight? Please help. Left With No One |
From a Teen: “I'm teased at school and all my mom says is 'Ignore them.'”Hey Terra, The kids at my school tease me because I'm a vegetarian and I'm not good at sports. I feel like I don't have any real friends because they're constantly telling me how weird I am, and this one girl, that I have to sit next to, enjoys throwing my pens and notebooks off my desk. I've tried telling my mom about this, but all of the things she told me to do didn't work, like ignoring them and laughing with them. The say my food is gross and they never listen to what I have to say. Sometimes I get so frustrated, that I start screaming at them. Then they ask me why I'm so mad. It's like they purposely upset me for fun. What should I do? Still Screaming |
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More letters about bullying from teens »
More letters about bullying from parents »
Additional Resources:
- Facebook — We’ve set up a Facebook page so you can join the discussion about bullying... share your experiences and any solutions you’ve found that actually help. Connect with others committed to ending bullying. More »
- Blog Post: “We kids would like to know…” — For almost 13 years tweens and teens have been asking me questions. Usually they’re having problems with friends, former friends, mean kids… You get the picture. Their sadness and confusion gets to me. Sometimes I tear up at the keyboard. Sometimes I yell in frustration. They don’t understand why a friend would treat them this way. I don’t get it either. But I try my best to help by telling them what they can do to improve the situation. More »
- Parent Forum article — “Don’t Add to the Garbage”
- Parenting tips for helping kids deal with friendship challenges
- Parenting tips for helping kids survive mean girls/guys
- Podcast: Queen Bees Go Hi-Tech — Guest: Rosalind Wiseman
- Download “Cruel's Not Cool” Workshop PDF